Three Minute Therapy: The Complete Guide to Dr Edelstein’s A to F Exercise and REBT

Three Minute Therapy is a short, structured self-help method developed by San Francisco psychologist Michael R. Edelstein, PhD, based on Albert Ellis’s rational emotive behaviour therapy (REBT). Its core tool, the Three Minute Exercise, walks you through six steps, A to F, to spot the rigid “must” behind an upsetting feeling, question it and replace it with a calmer, more realistic view.

Cognitive self-help (REBT) · Helps with: anxiety, worry, anger, low mood, low self-esteem, procrastination, overeating, shyness and relationship problems

Last updated: 30 October 2026

Written by Saj Ali

Reading time: about 16 minutes

How we wrote this guide: this guide was written by Saj Ali. Every research claim below links to the original study, its DOI or an official record.

Quick answer: what is Three Minute Therapy?

• It is based on REBT. Three Minute Therapy is “based on the teachings of Albert Ellis” and is described as a short-term, active, in-the-present approach (Three Minute Therapy).
• It was developed by Dr Michael Edelstein. Edelstein, who was trained by Albert Ellis, teaches people “how to be your own therapist” (Three Minute Therapy).
• Its core tool has six steps, A to F. The Three Minute Exercise covers the Activating event, irrational Belief, Consequences, Disputing, Effective new thinking and New Feeling or behaviour (Three Minute Therapy books).
• It targets three kinds of “musts”. Demands on yourself, on others and on life are seen as the source of much emotional upset (CBT and REBT, Three Minute Therapy).
• REBT is well researched. A meta-analysis of 50 years of REBT studies found a medium effect on outcomes and concluded that “REBT is a sound psychological intervention” (David et al., 2018).

Contents

1. What Is Three Minute Therapy?
   • The four principles
   • Three Minute Therapy at a Glance
2. Where Three Minute Therapy Came From
   • Albert Ellis and REBT
   • Michael Edelstein
3. How Three Minute Therapy Works
   • Practical problems and emotional problems
   • The three “musts”
   • From musts to preferences
   • The A to F model
4. How to Do the Three Minute Exercise
5. What People Use Three Minute Therapy For
6. A Worked Example
7. What the Research Shows
   • REBT research
   • CBT research
   • Self-help and homework
8. Tips for Disputing Irrational Beliefs
   • Useful rational phrases
9. Who Three Minute Therapy Is For
10. Watch, Listen and Follow
11. Frequently Asked Questions About Three Minute Therapy
12. Key Takeaways
13. Explore More on Self Help Supermarket
14. Sources

What Is Three Minute Therapy?

Three Minute Therapy is a practical way of changing how you feel by changing how you think. Its creator, Dr Michael R. Edelstein, describes it as “a short-term, low-cost process” for anyone “looking for a scientific, in-the-present, active treatment for coping with life’s difficulties” (Three Minute Therapy).

The name comes from its signature tool, the Three Minute Exercise. Once you have learned it, you can work through an upsetting situation on paper in just a few minutes, identifying the belief that is really driving your feelings and replacing it with a healthier one. In his foreword to the book, Albert Ellis noted that the exercises can be practised in short three-minute segments, repeated several times a day.

The aim is independence. Edelstein says he can “teach you how to be your own therapist so that you are not dependent on me for months or years of long-term therapy” (Three Minute Therapy).

The four principles

Three Minute Therapy rests on four simple principles (Three Minute Therapy):

1. You are responsible for your own emotions and actions.
2. Your harmful emotions and dysfunctional behaviours are the product of your irrational thinking.
3. You can learn more realistic views and, with practice, make them a part of you.
4. You will experience a deeper acceptance of yourself and greater satisfaction in life by developing a reality-based perspective.

Three Minute Therapy at a Glance

Details are from Three Minute Therapy and Three Minute Therapy books.

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Where Three Minute Therapy Came From

Albert Ellis and REBT

Three Minute Therapy grows directly out of the work of American psychologist Albert Ellis (1913–2007). In 1955 Ellis developed rational emotive behaviour therapy, or REBT, one of the first forms of what is now called cognitive behavioural therapy. A recent major review describes REBT as “one of the main pillars of cognitive-behavioral therapy” (David et al., 2018).

Ellis’s central insight was that people are disturbed not so much by events as by the views they take of them. He summed this up in the ABC model: an Activating event (A) leads to emotional Consequences (C) through your Beliefs (B) about it. Change the belief, and you change the feeling.

Michael Edelstein

Michael R. Edelstein is a clinical psychologist in private practice in San Francisco who was trained by Albert Ellis (Three Minute Therapy). He says he has helped thousands of clients overcome lifelong problems in a brief course of therapy. He offers sessions by phone, online and in person, as well as workshops, seminars, media interviews and supervision of therapists (Three Minute Therapy).

Edelstein wrote Three Minute Therapy: Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life with philosopher and author David Ramsay Steele, and Albert Ellis wrote the foreword. The book was first published in 1997, with a later edition in 2018. Its chapters work through common problems one by one, ending with a chapter called “How to Be Happy” and a copy of the Three Minute Exercise form (Three Minute Therapy books).

Edelstein also writes the blog The Three Minute Therapist for Psychology Today and hosts the long-running Three Minute Therapy Podcast, with hundreds of episodes on applying REBT to everyday life.

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How Three Minute Therapy Works

Practical problems and emotional problems

REBT makes a clear distinction between two kinds of difficulty. Your own mistakes, unfair treatment by others and undesirable situations are practical problems. But we tend to upset ourselves about these practical problems, “thereby unnecessarily creating a second order of problems – emotional suffering” (CBT and REBT, Three Minute Therapy). Three Minute Therapy focuses on this second layer, so you can feel calmer and then deal with the practical problem more effectively.

The three “musts”

According to REBT, most emotional upset comes from turning preferences into rigid demands. Edelstein highlights three main “musts” (CBT and REBT, Three Minute Therapy):

“Not until you have discovered the ‘must’,” Edelstein writes, “can you then go on effectively to reduce your distress” (CBT and REBT, Three Minute Therapy).

From musts to preferences

Once you have found and questioned a must, the next step is to reinforce a preference in its place. Edelstein offers three model preferences (CBT and REBT, Three Minute Therapy):

• “I strongly PREFER to do well and get approval, but even if I fail, I will accept myself fully.”
• “I strongly PREFER that you treat me reasonably, kindly, and lovingly, but since I don’t run the universe, and it’s a part of your human nature to err, I, then, cannot control you.”
• “I strongly PREFER that life be fair, easy, and hassle-free, and it’s very frustrating that it isn’t, but I can bear frustration and still considerably enjoy life.”

Without the turmoil, he says, “you’ll more easily experience love, involvement, and joy” (CBT and REBT, Three Minute Therapy).

The A to F model

The Three Minute Exercise extends Ellis’s ABC into six steps (Three Minute Therapy books):

Steps A, B and C diagnose the problem by finding the immediate cause of the feeling in your thinking. Steps D, E and F treat it (Edelstein, 2021).

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How to Do the Three Minute Exercise

The Three Minute Exercise is the heart of the method. It is set out as a simple A to F worksheet in the book Three Minute Therapy, and a printable version is available (Three Minute Therapy books; Three Minute Exercise form). Take a sheet of paper, or use the form, and think of something that upset you recently.

1. A: Activating event. Write down the event you felt upset about, in one or two plain sentences. For example: “I was criticised at work.”
2. B: Irrational Belief. Write down the rigid demand or evaluation you had about the event. Look for words like must, should, have to, awful and I can’t stand it. For example: “I MUST not be criticised.”
3. C: Consequences. Write down the emotional and behavioural consequences of that belief, such as “hurt and compulsive eating”, “anger” or “anxiety and avoiding my boss”.
4. D: Disputing. Question the belief. Ask: “Where is the evidence that, because I prefer this, it absolutely must be so?” “Does this make me, or them, a totally bad person?” “Does this belief help me reach my goals?”
5. E: Effective new thinking. Write the answers that come from disputing. For example: “Although I PREFER not to be criticised, nothing etched in stone states that I MUST not be. This is a hassle, not a horror.”
6. F: New Feeling or behaviour. Note the healthier feeling or action that follows from your new thinking, such as “disappointment, but calm” or “great displeasure and controlled eating”.
7. Reinforce. Read your E answers back to yourself slowly. Repeat the exercise for the same issue several times a day for a few days, or whenever the old feeling returns.

Edelstein compares learning to think rationally with learning a foreign language: it takes “practice, practice, practice” (Edelstein, 2021). The more you repeat your new conclusions, the more natural they become.

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What People Use Three Minute Therapy For

The Three Minute Therapy website lists a wide range of issues the approach is used for, including addiction, anger, anxiety and worry, depression, panic attacks, overeating, low self-esteem, smoking, shyness, procrastination and relationship problems (Three Minute Therapy). Some common examples:

• Worry and anxiety – softening “I must not fail” into “I would like to succeed, and I can cope if I don’t.” See anxiety.
• Anger – changing “He absolutely must not treat me this way” into “I strongly dislike this, but people are imperfect.” See anger and resentment.
• Low self-worth – separating your actions from your worth as a person. See self-esteem.
• Procrastination – challenging “It must be easy” and “I can’t stand doing this.” See procrastination.
• Comfort eating and habits – noticing the belief that triggers the urge. See comfort eating.
• Relationship difficulties – letting go of demands on a partner. See conflict resolution.

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A Worked Example

In a Psychology Today article, Edelstein shows how the exercise works for a common workplace frustration (Edelstein, 2022a).

A (Activating event): It’s 4:50pm and you are about to leave for a 5pm dinner with friends. Out of the blue, your manager assigns you a last-minute project.

B (irrational Belief): “I wish he were more considerate, therefore he absolutely should be more considerate. He’s a rotten person.”

C (Consequence): Great resentment.

D (Disputing): What’s the evidence that because I prefer him to be more considerate, he absolutely should be? How does his inconsiderate behaviour turn him into a thoroughly rotten human being? How does my resentment help me achieve my goals?

E (Effective new philosophy): Edelstein offers several rational answers, including:

• “My preferring he act more considerately only proves it’s what I value and I prefer.”
• “His inconsiderate decision only proves he’s an imperfect human who acts imperfectly, never a totally bad person.”
• “This is a hassle, not a horror.”
• “I can stand this unfair treatment although I greatly dislike it.”

F (New feeling): Disappointment and annoyance rather than seething resentment, which leaves you free to decide calmly how to handle the request.

Notice that the goal is not to feel nothing or to pretend you like the situation. Strong preferences and healthy negative feelings, such as disappointment or concern, are fine. The aim is to drop the rigid demands that turn them into rage, panic or despair.

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What the Research Shows

Three Minute Therapy is a direct application of REBT, which has been studied for more than half a century, and it sits within the wider family of cognitive behavioural therapies, one of the most researched approaches in psychology.

REBT research

A 2018 systematic review and meta-analysis examined REBT research going back to its beginnings, drawing on 84 articles. It found a medium effect of REBT compared with other interventions on outcomes (d = 0.58) and on irrational beliefs (d = 0.70) at the end of treatment. Within-group analyses showed similar medium effects. The authors concluded that “REBT is a sound psychological intervention” (David et al., 2018).

The study also supports the idea at the heart of Three Minute Therapy: that changing irrational beliefs is part of how the approach helps. REBT reduced irrational beliefs as well as improving outcomes (David et al., 2018).

CBT research

A review of 269 meta-analyses of cognitive behavioural therapy found strong support for CBT for anxiety disorders, general stress, anger control, somatoform disorders and bulimia, among other problems (Hofmann et al., 2012). Because Three Minute Therapy uses the same core skill of identifying and changing unhelpful thoughts, this research is a helpful guide to the kinds of problems it may suit.

Self-help and homework

Edelstein stresses practical homework exercises with feedback (Three Minute Therapy). Written exercises such as the A to F form are a standard part of CBT and REBT, giving people a way to practise the skills between sessions and keep using them afterwards. Our CBT guide explains more about how these thought records work.

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Tips for Disputing Irrational Beliefs

The D step, disputing, is where change happens. These questions, drawn from Edelstein’s examples, can help (Edelstein, 2022a; Edelstein, 2021):

• Evidence: “Where is the proof that, because I want this, it must be so?”
• Logic: “Does one action really make someone a totally bad person?”
• Helpfulness: “Is this belief helping me reach my goals, or making me feel worse?”
• Perspective: “Is this truly awful, or is it a hassle I can handle?”
• Tolerance: “Can I stand this, even if I greatly dislike it?”

Useful rational phrases

Edelstein quotes psychiatrist Maxie Maultsby: “Reinforcement is the royal road to learning.” Ponder, review and repeat your rational conclusions “again and again and again” (Edelstein, 2021).

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Who Three Minute Therapy Is For

Three Minute Therapy may suit you if:

• You like practical, structured tools you can use on paper.
• You want to be your own therapist rather than relying on long-term sessions.
• You prefer working in the present rather than exploring your childhood.
• You often think in “musts”, “shoulds” and “I can’t stand it”.
• You want a short daily practice for worry, anger or low mood.
• You have tried CBT and want a simple, focused version of its key skill.

The book is a good starting point for self-help. If you would like personal guidance, Edelstein and other REBT-trained therapists offer sessions, and many people combine the exercise with support from their doctor or therapist.

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Watch, Listen and Follow

Hear Dr Michael Edelstein explain Three Minute Therapy and the Three Minute Exercise, and learn the ABC model of REBT from Albert Ellis and other teachers.

Videos

• What Is Three Minute Therapy/Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT)? – Michael Edelstein. Michael Edelstein explains Three Minute Therapy and REBT.
• Three Minute Exercise for Overcoming Hurt, Depression, and Compulsive Eating (short version) – Michael Edelstein. A Three Minute Exercise for hurt, low mood and compulsive eating.
• 1. Dr. Michael Edelstein, an Original REBT Advocate – Three Minute Therapy Podcast. Dr Michael Edelstein on his background in REBT.
• 366. REBT & Long Term Happiness – Three Minute Therapy Podcast. REBT and long-term happiness.
• Albert Ellis on REBT Video – PsychotherapyNet. Albert Ellis talks about REBT.
• ABCDE Model. Change Negative Thoughts and Beliefs. CBT and REBT. – Teresa Lewis | Lewis Psychology. The ABCDE model for changing negative thoughts and beliefs.
• Albert Ellis Changed Therapy Forever | The ABC Model Explained – Daniel McIsaac PhD LCPC. How Albert Ellis’s ABC model works.
• ABC Model of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy – Therapist Aid. A short animated guide to the ABC model.
• The ABC Model in Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), Lecture, Graduate REBT course – Psychotherapy Education and Training. A lecture on the ABC model in REBT.

Three Minute Therapy resources

• Three Minute Therapy – Dr Michael Edelstein’s site, with principles, services and articles.
• Three Minute Therapy books – the book and the free Three Minute Exercise form.
• CBT and REBT, Three Minute Therapy – an overview of REBT and the three main musts.
• Three Minute Exercise form – a printable Three Minute Exercise worksheet.

Books

• Three Minute Therapy: Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life – Michael R. Edelstein and David Ramsay Steele, with a foreword by Albert Ellis (Glenbridge, 1997; new edition 2018).
• A Guide to Rational Living – Albert Ellis and Robert A. Harper (1961). The classic self-help introduction to REBT.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Three Minute Therapy

What is Three Minute Therapy?

Three Minute Therapy is a self-help method developed by psychologist Michael Edelstein and based on Albert Ellis’s REBT. It uses a six-step A to F exercise to identify, question and replace the irrational beliefs behind upsetting feelings.

Who created Three Minute Therapy?

Dr Michael R. Edelstein, a San Francisco clinical psychologist trained by Albert Ellis, created it. He wrote the book Three Minute Therapy with David Ramsay Steele, and Ellis wrote the foreword.

What does A to F stand for?

A is the Activating event, B the irrational Belief, C the emotional and behavioural Consequences, D Disputing the belief, E Effective new thinking and F the New Feeling or behaviour.

Does it really take only three minutes?

Once you are familiar with the exercise, you can work through it in a few minutes. Ellis noted that the exercises can be practised in three-minute segments repeated several times a day.

What are the three musts?

REBT identifies three main demands: a demand on yourself to do well and win approval, a demand that others treat you well, and a demand that life be fair, easy and hassle-free.

Is Three Minute Therapy the same as CBT?

It is a form of REBT, which was one of the first cognitive behavioural therapies. It shares CBT’s focus on changing thoughts, with a special emphasis on rigid “musts”.

What research supports Three Minute Therapy?

Three Minute Therapy is based on REBT, and a meta-analysis of 50 years of REBT research found medium positive effects on outcomes and on irrational beliefs.

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Key Takeaways

• Three Minute Therapy was developed by psychologist Michael Edelstein, who was trained by Albert Ellis.
• It is based on rational emotive behaviour therapy (REBT).
• Its core tool is the six-step A to F Three Minute Exercise.
• It targets three rigid demands: on yourself, on others and on life.
• The goal is to turn “musts” into preferences and become your own therapist.
• A meta-analysis of 50 years of REBT research found medium positive effects.

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Explore More on Self Help Supermarket

Use these guides alongside this one:

• CBT – change thoughts and behaviour
• The Work of Byron Katie – question your thoughts
• The Lefkoe Method – dissolve limiting beliefs
• Mindfulness – present-moment awareness
• NLP – reframe your thinking
• The Sedona Method – let go of feelings
• Anxiety – feel calmer
• Anger and resentment – cool down
• Depression – lift your mood
• Overthinking – quiet the mind
• Procrastination – get started
• Self-esteem – value yourself
• Browse all self-help techniques – compare every method on Self Help Supermarket.

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Sources

1. Edelstein, M. R. Three Minute Therapy with Dr Edelstein. Home. https://threeminutetherapy.com/
2. Edelstein, M. R. Self-help books and the Three Minute Exercise form. https://threeminutetherapy.com/books
3. Edelstein, M. R. CBT & REBT. https://threeminutetherapy.com/articles-and-videos/rebt
4. Edelstein, M. R. Three Minute Exercise [worksheet]. From Three Minute Therapy: Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life. https://rebtinfo.com/wp-content/uploads/ThreeMinuteExercise-ilovepdf-compressed.pdf
5. Edelstein, M. R. (2022, April). 6 steps to change your thinking and change your life. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-three-minute-therapist/202204/6-steps-change-your-thinking-and-change-your-life
6. Edelstein, M. R. (2021, December). 5 steps to manage an anger problem. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-three-minute-therapist/202112/5-steps-manage-anger-problem
7. David, D., Cotet, C., Matu, S., Mogoase, C., & Stefan, S. (2018). 50 years of rational-emotive and cognitive-behavioral therapy: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 74(3), 304–318. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.22514
8. Hofmann, S. G., Asnaani, A., Vonk, I. J. J., Sawyer, A. T., & Fang, A. (2012). The efficacy of cognitive behavioral therapy: A review of meta-analyses. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 36(5), 427–440. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10608-012-9476-1

Self Help Supermarket guides are for general information and are not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.