Dr Kristin Neff is the researcher who first defined and measured self-compassion, and the founder and president of the Self-Compassion Institute. Her work, books and the Mindful Self-Compassion programme she developed with Dr Chris Germer have helped people around the world learn to treat themselves with the kindness they would offer a good friend. [1]
Who is Kristin Neff?
Kristin Neff earned her bachelor’s degree in communication studies at UCLA and her doctorate in moral development at the University of California, Berkeley, followed by two years of postdoctoral research on self-concept development at the University of Denver. She then became an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. [1]
In her last year of graduate school she became interested in Buddhism and began practising self-compassion. During her postdoctoral work she set out to research it, developed a theory and created a scale to measure it. [1] Her seminal articles were published in 2003, and well over 10,000 studies on self-compassion have since been carried out by scholars around the world. [1] [2]
With her colleague Dr Chris Germer she developed the Mindful Self-Compassion programme and co-founded the nonprofit Center for Mindful Self-Compassion. [1] [3] After her academic career she founded the Self-Compassion Institute, which helps people learn self-compassion skills in an accessible way through talks, podcasts and workshops. [1]
Her approach in brief
- Self-kindness. Speak to yourself as warmly as you would to a friend who is struggling.
- Common humanity. Remember that difficulty and imperfection are part of being human.
- Mindfulness. Notice painful feelings with balanced awareness, without ignoring or exaggerating them.
- Tender and fierce. Self-compassion soothes and accepts, and it also protects, provides and motivates.
- Practise little and often. Short practices, like the self-compassion break, build the habit.
At a glance
Profession: Researcher, author and teacher
Doctorate: University of California, Berkeley
Academic role: Associate Professor, University of Texas at Austin
Founded: Self-Compassion Institute
Website: self-compassion.org
Good fit if
You are hard on yourself, you struggle with your inner critic or perfectionism, or you want practical, research-based ways to feel calmer and more resilient.
Our take
A warm, clear teacher whose research has put self-compassion on the map. Start with the short video on the three elements, then try a guided self-compassion break.
Kristin Neff’s key ideas
Her model of self-compassion is simple to learn and easy to practise. Tap a card to read more.
The three elements
In her model, self-compassion has three parts: self-kindness rather than self-judgement, a sense of common humanity rather than isolation, and mindfulness rather than over-identification with painful thoughts and feelings. [2] Our guide to self-compassion explains each element with practical examples.
The self-compassion break
The self-compassion break is a short practice for difficult moments. You acknowledge that this is a moment of suffering, remind yourself that suffering is part of life, and offer yourself a kind word or gesture, such as a hand on your heart. Dr Neff’s own guided version appears in the videos on this page.
Tender and fierce
In Fierce Self-Compassion she describes two sides of self-compassion. Tender self-compassion comforts and accepts; fierce self-compassion helps us speak up, protect ourselves and take action. Both are needed for a balanced life, and fierce self-compassion supports setting healthy boundaries.
Self-compassion and self-esteem
Self-esteem often depends on feeling better than others or succeeding, so it can rise and fall. Self-compassion does not require comparison or success; it is there when things go wrong. Her popular TEDx talk explores this difference. Our guide to self-esteem and self-love practices offer more.
Mindful Self-Compassion
Mindful Self-Compassion (MSC) is the training programme she developed with Dr Chris Germer. It is taught by trained teachers in many formats around the world, and the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion lists courses. [3] Our mindfulness guide is a helpful companion.
Videos with Kristin Neff
Hand-picked and checked one by one: short introductions, a guided practice and a longer talk.
Start here
Practise with Kristin
Talks
Articles about Kristin Neff
Books by Kristin Neff
Her books translate research into practical, everyday self-compassion. [1]
Buy Self-Compassion in your country: US · UK · Canada · Australia · India.
Courses and free resources
Her website shares free guided practices and exercises, a good way to begin before choosing a book or course. [1]
What the Research Shows
Dr Neff’s work launched a large field of research.
- Measuring self-compassion. Her 2003 Self-Compassion Scale gave researchers a way to measure the three elements, and is widely used. [2]
- Self-compassion and wellbeing. A 2012 meta-analysis found a large association between higher self-compassion and lower depression, anxiety and stress. [4]
Frequently asked questions
Who is Kristin Neff?
A researcher and author who first defined and measured self-compassion, and founder of the Self-Compassion Institute.
What are the three elements of self-compassion?
Self-kindness, common humanity and mindfulness.
What is the self-compassion break?
A short practice: acknowledge the difficult moment, remember others feel this too, and offer yourself kindness.
What is Mindful Self-Compassion?
A training programme developed by Kristin Neff and Chris Germer, taught by trained teachers worldwide.
What is fierce self-compassion?
The protective, action-oriented side of self-compassion that helps us speak up and meet our needs.
Which Kristin Neff book should I read first?
Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself.
Is self-compassion the same as self-esteem?
No. Self-esteem often depends on success or comparison; self-compassion is kindness that is there when things go wrong.
Sources
- Self-Compassion Institute: About Kristin Neff
- Neff, The development and validation of a scale to measure self-compassion, Self and Identity 2003
- Center for Mindful Self-Compassion
- MacBeth and Gumley, Exploring compassion: a meta-analysis of the association between self-compassion and psychopathology, Clinical Psychology Review 2012
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