Louise Hay (1926–2017) was an American author, speaker and the founder of the publisher Hay House, and is described on her official website as “one of the founders of the self-help movement.” [1] Her best-known book, You Can Heal Your Life, has sold more than 50 million copies worldwide, according to her website. She died in San Diego in 2017, aged 90. [1]
Who is Louise Hay?
Louise was born in Los Angeles on 8 October 1926. [1] Her website describes a childhood that was “unstable and impoverished,” and she later spoke openly about how her early years left her feeling “worthless.” [1] [2] She moved to New York City, where she worked as a model for Bill Blass and other designers. [1]
In the early 1970s she began studying at the Science of Mind church in New York, became a popular speaker and started counselling clients. [1] She was inspired by a simple idea she once heard: “if you’re willing to change your thinking you can change your life.” Early on she came across Florence Scovel Shinn’s The Game of Life and How to Play It, and identified with its strong, affirmative style. [2]
After moving back to Southern California in 1980, she began putting her workshops on paper. [1] “I said to myself if I could just put this workshop on paper I could help more people,” she recalled. [2] The result was You Can Heal Your Life, published in 1984, which reached the New York Times bestseller list. [1]
Because she doubted a big publisher would print her work unchanged, she published it herself. “Then one day I printed somebody else’s book and that’s when you become a publisher,” she said. [2] That company became Hay House, whose authors include Dr Wayne Dyer. [1] She also set up The Hay Foundation, a non-profit that supports charities providing food, shelter and counselling. [1]
Her approach in brief
- Love yourself first. Start in the mirror.
- Say affirmations. Think about what you want.
- Forgive. Release yourself from the past.
- Be grateful. Say thank you often.
At a glance
Known for: Mirror work and affirmations
Topics: Self-love, self-esteem, forgiveness, gratitude
Format: Books, audio, guided meditations
Books: You Can Heal Your Life, Mirror Work
YouTube: Hay House
Good fit if
You’re hard on yourself, you want a gentle daily habit for self-esteem, or you like affirmations and guided meditations.
Our take
The warm, simple voice behind mirror work and daily affirmations. Start with her four-minute mirror work video.
Louise Hay’s practices
These practices come from her talks, courses and writing, explained in her own words. Tap a card to read more.
Mirror work
Louise taught mirror work “for as long as I’ve been teaching affirmations.” She believed “the most powerful affirmations are those you say out loud when you are in front of a mirror looking into your own eyes.” [3]
A mirror, she explained, “reflects back to you the feelings you have about yourself,” and “will make you immediately aware of where you are resisting and where you are open and flowing.” [3]
Most of us, she noted, criticise ourselves in the mirror out of habit. Instead, “we want to be our own cheerleader.” She might say to herself, “you look fantastic kid.” [4] At first it feels like work, “so we call it mirror work,” but as it turns into fun, “we call it mirror play.” [3]
Your first mirror exercise
Louise’s day one exercise is simple. [3]
- Stand or sit in front of your mirror and look into your eyes.
- Take a deep breath and say, “I want to like you. I want to really learn to love you.”
- Breathe again and say, “I am learning to really like you. I am learning to really love you.”
- Use your own name and say, “I am willing to learn to love you.”
- Repeat it each time you pass a mirror, even silently.
She was honest that “the first day can be challenging. You may feel silly or stupid or even angry and may want to cry. It’s all right.” [3] If “I love you” feels too much, she suggested a softer start: “I’m willing to learn to like you.” [4]
All is well
When a problem comes up, Louise’s favourite words were: “all is well everything is working out for my highest good and out of this situation this so-called problem only good will come and I am safe.” [2]
She explained what the phrase does: “it quiets your mind down” long enough for a solution to appear. [2] When she had a real problem, she said, “I will Babble that incessantly” because “it’ll change what I’m giving out.” [2]
She also loved simplicity. “We make life extraordinarily complicated,” she said, “and it’s really very simple.” [2]
Say what you do want
Louise noticed that when you ask people what they want, “what they usually say to you is well I don’t want this and they give you a whole list of what they don’t want.” [2]
She thought of life “as a boomerang what you give out you’re going to get back,” so “what we believe about ourselves and about life is going to become true for us.” [2]
What keeps most of us stuck, in her view, is that “we don’t believe we deserve” good things, “we think we’re not good enough.” [2] That’s why her affirmations so often start with self-worth, such as “I am open and receptive to all good.” [3]
Forgiveness
Louise saw forgiveness as essential. “We all have people to forgive,” she said, “and that does not mean to condone poor Behavior but it’s to release us from the bondage from what somebody has done to us.” [2]
When people told her affirmations weren’t working, she asked two questions: how often they actually say them compared with “the grunge thinking,” and “who do you need to forgive.” [2]
She also suggested doing forgiveness in front of a mirror, ideally a big one you sit down in front of, “because you won’t run away.” [4]
Three daily habits
“Self-esteem, self-love, self-worth,” Louise wrote, “is a seed that grows if you water it.” [5] Her three favourite daily tools are: [5]
- Keep a journal. Write down your experiences, how you felt, and whether you acted in line with your inner voice.
- Practise meditation. Relax, breathe and rest your thoughts, and reflect on what you want.
- Practise mirror work. Look into your eyes and meet your fears with compassion.
She added a reassuring note: “We are not defined by the mistakes we make.” [5]
Videos with Louise Hay
Hand-picked from Hay House’s official channels, and checked one by one: mirror work, affirmations, forgiveness and guided meditations.
Start here
Mirror work and self-love
Affirmations
Meditations
Conversations
Articles about Louise Hay
Louise Hay’s books
Louise wrote many books; these are good places to start.
Find her books in your country: US · UK · Canada · Australia · India.
Where to learn from her
Louise’s official website shares free daily affirmations and articles, and Hay House publishes her books, audio and meditations. [1]
Her books are available worldwide, including the US, UK, Canada, Australia, Europe and India.
What the Research Shows
Two ideas close to Louise’s work, kindness towards yourself and speaking to yourself by name, have been studied by psychologists.
- Self-compassion. Treating yourself with the kindness you would show a friend is linked with greater wellbeing and resilience. [6]
- How you talk to yourself. Talking to yourself in the second or third person helped people stay calmer and perform better under stress. [7]
Frequently asked questions
Who was Louise Hay?
An American author and speaker who founded Hay House and is called one of the founders of the self-help movement.
What is mirror work?
Saying affirmations out loud while looking into your own eyes in a mirror.
How do I start mirror work?
Look into your eyes and say, “I am willing to learn to love you,” using your own name.
What was her favourite affirmation?
“All is well, everything is working out for my highest good, out of this situation only good will come, and I am safe.”
What did she say about forgiveness?
That forgiving doesn’t condone poor behaviour; it releases you.
What is Hay House?
The publishing company she started with her own books.
Where should I start?
Her four-minute mirror work video, then the Tavis Smiley interview.
Sources
- Louise Hay: About Louise
- Hay House: Louise Hay at the Tavis Smiley Show
- Hay House: Mirror Work with Louise Hay
- Hay House: Louise Hay's Mirror Work
- Louise Hay: 3 Powerful Habits for Building Your Self-Esteem
- Neff, Self-Compassion: An Alternative Conceptualization of a Healthy Attitude Toward Oneself, Self and Identity 2003
- Kross et al., Self-talk as a regulatory mechanism: How you do it matters, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 2014
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